Storage Wars: Canada: A Fast Talking Pecker

featuredpic_Patrick PeckerB_SWCAN1-14

Storage Wars: Canada: Season 1, Episode 10: “Canadian Pecker.”

Don was still on vacation, so Patrick Pecker filled in for him as auctioneer.

Patrick Pecker: I’m more aggressive than Don. Today, I’m bringing the full Pecker.

Cindy and Rick knew it’s always good business to be respectful to the auctioneer. When they arrived, they made sure to shake hands with Pecker.

Still high off his last big score, Roy was ready to show everyone who the boss was at today’s auction.

Ursula brought a good luck charm with her. She needed her mojo to grab some better lockers. And, of course, the charm matched her outfit.

Paul and Bogart were dressed for success. Now that Bogart was a partner, he felt the Kenny ‘brand’ needed a makeover. So he made Paul ditch his signature hat and Hawaiian shirt for a button down shirt and tie. Paul looked sharp, but wasn’t sure how a fancy haircut and shirt would make him a better buyer.

Once they all arrived, Roy was giving his old nemesis, Pecker, a lot of grief before the auction even began.

Someone should have told Roy: Never piss off the Pecker.

1storageunit_SWCAN1-141st Storage Unit

A little light, but there was furniture, a snowboard, and some mystery boxes.

Roy had to raise a ruckus to get his bids recognized by Pecker. It was more effort than what he was willing to put in.

Paul and Bogie got the unit for $350.

Bogart: Buying with style!! (realizes) Wait, did dad just call me ‘potato’?

This was Paul’s first locker without his lucky hat! And he was ambivalent when they opened it up. Inside, they found a few heavy items, like a poker table. And not so heavy items, like a fountain pen.

They also found a nice kite board and the kite to go with it. Bogart said he was not going to be the guinea pig to test it out.1storageunit_CHUTE_SWCAN1-14

Paul: I’ll do it myself, if I never ever have to wear this shirt and tie again.

They took the kite board to a local beach to meet a kite boarding aficionado. He let them know the boy’s used board and kite was worth around $1,000.

Bogart: Surf’s up!

Paul was just happy he got to wear his Hawaiian shirt to the beach.

2storageunit_SWCAN1-142nd Storage Unit

Good stuff: Display tables, soft drink machine, and nice tables.

Roy kept upping the bid. And then… he opened his mouth one too many times.

Pecker gave Roy the closing bid. But Roy said he never put the last bid on it!

After some back n’ forth, Roy accepted the bid, and took over the unit – but he maintained he never bid at $375.

Roy: (under his breath) Pecker head.

But once he got inside the unit, Roy was singing the Pecker’s praises. He found a very nice table, and some candy vending machines… filled with money!2storageunit_vending_SWCAN1-14

Roy: (as quarters drop out of his pockets) I got money coming out of my ass!

Roy took the vending machines to his buddy, who let Roy know the machines were… worthless. Wah–WAAAHHH.

But he did help Roy count up all the change Roy found in the machines: $1,455 in quarters. Jackpot!

3storageunit_SWCAN1-143rd Storage Unit

Eh. Just some tools and not much else of interest. And not very neatly packed. The only one who looked interested was Roy…

Who grabbed at one of the bags in the locker. A BIG ‘no-no’ in this business.

Pecker told Roy to back off and that Roy should know better.

When the bids started, Pecker reprimanded Paul for making chitchat with Bogie while the bidding went on…

Pecker: I should make you pay $100 just for all the noise.

Although Pecker was perturbed by Paul, Ursula landed the locker for $150.

She found a few old toolboxes and a few nice old collectible tools. Which she took to her friend, and veteran iron worker, Merv (who looked like an MMA fighter).

Merv told Ursula she had a ‘spud wrench’ and that it was used to both tighten and align bolts.3storageunit_boxes_SWCAN1-14

He then brought Ursula up to the building frame he ‘d been working on and let her tighten some bolts. Ursula just, uh… wanted to know what the wrenches were worth. And she wanted to get back down to the ground. Quickly.

Merv let her know, all the stuff she brought him was only valued around $160.

Ursula: That’s it! I’ll give you that much to take me back down!

Back at the auction, Rick was pissed he and Cindy  were once again leaving without a locker, but Cindy took it all in stride…

Cindy: No reason to let the Crazies make you crazier.

Meanwhile, Bogart and Paul were still at the beach, doing their best to learn some paddle boarding.

Let’s just say the Kenny family needs to stick to buying lockers and trying not to piss off Pecker at their next purchase.

PROFIT SCORECARD:

Roy Dirnbeck: $2,189
Paul Kenny & Bogart Kenny: $750
Ursula Stolf: $145
Rick Coffill & Cindy Hayden: $0

A miscommunication between Roy and Pecker ended with Roy profiting. Ever make money off someone who tried to do something you didn’t want them to?

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Matt Stacey

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