Storage Wars: Texas: Shock Me!

bubba-ricky-smith-SWTX-1-7 copyStorage Wars: Texas: Season 1, Episode 7: “Home on the Strange.”

Bubba and Ricky profited on resale of woman’s merchandise out of their warehouse in Lampass, Texas. Instead of tools or man cave items; uncle and nephew game plane to take a closer look at lockers with items that appeal to women.

Victor’s game plant to put aside his usual tricks and head games and actually buy a quality locker.

Lesa‘s store had sold furniture left and right. Her game plan to buy more furniture. Moe’s game plan to buy oddities for his more eccentric customers.


1st Storage Unit

Good Lord. Someone call the garbage man! Bald tires, cracked stove top, and other crap which cannot be unseen.

Ricky: The thing about the female species is, they like purtty. And this ain’t purtty.

Lesa said whoever bid on this unit had to be a moron.  Hmmm…

Moe snapped it up for $200. He had a feeling about it. Later, he slipped away to see if there were any odd treasures to be found.

Eureka! Doc found a brass industrial fixture that dated back to the 1950s. Appraiser was a train engineer. He informed Moe this brass fixture was a train whistle – also called a ‘hooter.’ It was a rare historical piece manufactured in 1850s.1storageunit_whistle_SWTX1-7

Moe: 1850?! I was off by a hundred years!

Whistle worked which placed the value around $1,000.

2storageunit_SWTX1-72nd Storage Unit

Packed space with tools, fake plants, and lots of mystery boxes.

Lesa believed mystery boxes would lead straight to the bank. Ricky was quick to note there were some women’s items tucked inside the locker.

Ricky: That quilt? It didn’t belong to some dude.

Bubba grabbed it for $550.

Uncle and nephew dug through the boxes. Huh? They found an electricity producing Tesla contraption. Ricky was sure it was used to treat hemorrhoids. Bubba explained it was a showpiece that shot electricity out of it.

Ricky:  That’s right, for hemorrhoids!

Bubba conceded it was not girly, but it was definitely bizarre.2storageunit_teslacoil_SWTX1-7

Appraiser stated the Tesla coil pumped out 15 thousand volts. Holy Cow! Ricky just needed to know what it was worth. After the six-hour drive to get an estimate, his hemorrhoids were killing him.

Valued at $800.

But wait, there’s more. Expert showed them a 20-foot Tesla coil which lit up the night sky! Bubba and Ricky in awe.

Ricky: I guess it’s not all about the money.

3storageunit_SWTX1-73rd Storage Unit 

Hoarder locker. Packed to the brim. Antiques, furniture, with buku boxes stacked one on top of another.

Lesa: There’s enough furniture to fill a house.

A few boxes had to be placed on the ground when the door was opened. Lesa asked auctioneer Walt if he could tell her what was in the boxes.  No dice, Lesa.

Ricky spotted items that would appeal to women.

Ricky: Two things I know about women: They like decorating and they love their antiques. It’s in their DNA.

Victor noted the units owners had a center aisle for easy access to the boxes in the locker. That, combined with nicely packed items, spelled $$$.

Lesa and Victor duked it out. Bid rose up to $1,000. Just when it appeared as if Lesa would walk away with the unit…

Ricky: It’s time to go to work.

Ricky placed a bid until finally he dropped the locker on Lesa at $1,450.

Lesa: I got my big girl panties on today.

Victor left in a huff. Sorry Doc. Nothing eccentric here but you.

Lesa and Jerry unloaded everything back at her store. But as they sorted the merchandise, she did not see a profit. Jerry discovered an antique wind-up cowboy. Lesa exhale. All may not be lost.3storageunit_display_SWTX1-7

Off to an antiques dealer to get the item appraised. Expert stated item was a mechanical cowboy that dated back to the 1950s. Department store such as Beringers would use this mechanical device to display jewelry. Very rare. Estimated valued at around $8,500.

Jerry speechless. Lesa hyperventilated.


Lesa Lewis: $8,200
Moe Prigoff: $1,385
Ricky & Bubba Smith: $760
Victor Rjesnjansky: $0

What’s the craziest roadside attraction you’ve stopped to see?

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Matt Stacey

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